Crazy thinking!
by Mina Phantonhive
Summary: Killua is losing his mind because of Gon! Is he gonna leave his friend behind?


Killua was having problems about concentration. Every single time that he was trying to focus, Gon popped inside his head. That wasn't right. It was like he was somebody else, thinking and living for himself and he was just a freaky voyeur.

The white-haired guy could actually see the events happening like in a tv program, where he was just an crazy viewer, not a real person that was living the situation. Or maybe he was possessed. Just these two options. However, Killua really believed that he was possessed. ** That is what it was**. But what the hell he had, that everything was trying to possess him? C'mon! He had a freaky needle inside his head! How awful that was!

Maybe he was just crazy, tired, losing his mind for a random reason. Not anything about him dreaming of Gon, his best friend in insane situations, smut situations. Things that he had only seen in video, because he needed to look so cool for Gon. Look cool and lose his mind! What a trade!

Yeah, Gon. The reason for all of this crap! **Crap!** He knew that was insane. Gon wasn't the type that goes along to perverted actions. The kid doesn't even know how to spell perverted, or even what meand. He is naïve, pure, amazing….

Ok, that was enough. Gon wasn't amazing! He had no boundaries, always guided by his curiosity…ok..curiosity could lead Gon to make Killua's dream come true?

_What the hell am I thinking about?_

These thoughts that Killua were having, were like fuel to his fantasies. He knew that was wrong…so wrong. It was at least unfair that Killua wanted to be with Gon being aware that he was going to leave him soon.

Yes, he was planning to leave. He had no choice! Gon or his brain, that he was so proud of…that battle was just lost.

He was, because the whole situation to have hots for other person, other guy, most of all, was too confusing. Ok, that was not only a matter of attraction. There was something else, some kind of hook that pulled him towards Gon, but he was bound to break it. He was. He had to do it, to leave Gon behind. Because Killua was used to leave people behind! Easy!. That was his nature, he was a leaver.

It was so easy to leave, not get attached, so easy to live alone. But no. Gon wasn't going to leave Killua abandon him, even Gon had no knowledge about his friend's thoughts, he just was letting that happen.

Sometimes, it was unfair, or fair enough. Give up his only desire. That was the best solution, right?

_"Killua, what's wrong? You seem upset."_

_"Me? No. I am ok! Just fine, you see? I am training math! Because I heard about this super difficult math game and, of course I wanna ace it and I am just training."_

_"Oh. I see. But murmur that you have to leave me is part of the training?"_

Crap! Now he was speaking without knowing? What the hell was that?

_"What did I do wrong? Why do you wanna leave? Did you find something to do? Better then be with mew. I know that when we started our journey, you said that you would stay until you find a goal to yourself, but I've hoped that our goals were united and you never had to leave me behind"._

Oh Gon! No, was nothing like that! Killua couldn't even say anything properly. And Gon wasn't about to silence.

_"I really wanna know what is wrong. You see. That may be a little selfish of me. Because you accompanied me in my search, my journey, my development. I acknowledge that! I really do! But I never really thought that you would be fed up with my company. I am sorry that I made you wanna leave."_

Wait! Gon was crying! He was really crying! But why? Why was he crying about? Killua couldn't leave! Gon was his dear friend! His only friend. His only desire! The only thing he ever desired in his entire and short life was Gon's friendship. **Nothing else! **And Gon was kind enough to not judge him for his previous actions. He was kind, he was the friend that he needed the most. The only thing that he ever needed.

_"I never gonna leave you, baka! I'll stay with you for now and ever. Untill you want me around and need me."_

_"Amazing! So you and me, forever together! I gonna need you forever Killua."_


End file.
